Social Media Spoiler Alert

So it’s Saturday night and your group text message is buzzing non-stop about this rando party in Allston that “like omg ERRYBODY is gonna be TURNT UP at” You could spend the next two hours deciding what clothes to wear or whether or not you actually feel like putting in your contacts for what seems like a decently enjoyable time…but instead you silence your phone, remain on your couch in your comfy pajamas for the remainder of the night and let Netflix do what it does best- keep on playing.

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This phenomenon, known as ‘binge-watching’, has become so popular that it was one of the runner-up phrases of 2013, only losing to ‘selfie.’ Indeed, sixty-one percent of people who stream at least one TV show per week reported that they binge on shows, and 73 percent reported “positive feelings” about the behavior. Basically everybody’s doing it, and we’re all “sorry, not sorry” about it.

It’s difficult to pinpoint what fuels our desire for the rapid consumption of our favorite media, whether it be a longing to disconnect from reality for 6 hours or just an obsession that cannot be quelled. In this age of social media though, a new excuse to binge-watch is born, one of necessity. In this world where everyone has a loud, electronic voice and are already binge-watching your favorite shows the chances of big twists and turns being spoiled for you increase daily. As such, it becomes increasingly dangerous to NOT binge-watch shows.

Before I go any further, it is important to note that the aforementioned scenario happened to me very recently and I write this now from a place of pure, unadulterated rage.

The scene of the crime unfolds like this: Flash to our hero, on vacation visiting a friend in New Orleans. Not exactly an ideal opportunity to sit down for 13 hours and watch the entirety of the BRAND NEW 2nd season of the Emmy award winning House of Cards, starring one of his favorite actors, Kevin Spacey. Pulling out his phone he finds his thumb brush over the Twitter icon, a habit he frequently partakes in. Pan over to calm scrolling over all of his followed account, WHEN SUDDENLY IT HAPPENS. A spoiler to end all spoilers, by the hands of some random biddie from High School nonetheless.Our hero, shocked and enraged, quickly expires from this world cursing all who inhabit it.

well almost.

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But seriously, that was a huge bummer. The question now becomes how can we prevent tragedies like this from happening? Cut ourselves off from social media? Nearly impossible. Binge watch shows as soon as they are available? I mean, yeah maybe?

How about people stop being HUGE JERKS and don’t post spoilers on social media? The ideal situation, in my humble opinion.

I guess everything in life should just come with a SPOILER ALERT.

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-Griffin Lane

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